Psychological Confidence Booster
Sequel to this; physical confidence booster, here is the psychological confidence booster. As stated earlier on, wars are first won in the mind. For when you lose in the mind, you lose in real life.
Psychological Confidence Booster
A Positive mindset.
This has to do with your perspective about life. The periscope with which you chose to see the world. Instead of seeing the cup half empty, always see it half full. Instead of dwelling on what you don’t have, learn to appreciate what you do have. Be thankful for life. And know that every stage in life is nothing but a learning phase. Learn the lessons, forget the details.
Furthermore, as I write about this, my three weeks’ experience in NYSC camp, after graduating from the University, in preparation for serving my country through the National Youth Service Corps (NYSC) comes to mind. Though it was three weeks in the calendar, in real-life, it felt like six months! Because we sleep by 12-1am and wake up by 3:30am daily. Then we hustle to fetch water, join the queue to use the bathroom (with your waist bag, containing your valuables, always with you even in the restroom!). After freshening up, we get dressed and try to catch a little sleep before the trumpet for morning drills blows and the soldiers come barging in with orders to move.
Moreover, the morning military parade takes between two to three hours, of either standing at attention, jogging, matching, or some other energy-draining drills, after the national anthem. Thereafter, we go for breakfast and rest for about two hours before heading to lecture for about 4-5 hours with lunch in-between. The only time we had a little respite was in the evening hours when we visit the popular ‘mami’ markets for good food and drinks(beer and the likes). Until we return to the dormitories and the loud chats, mostly induced by beer, kicks in. This would go on till 12-1am before sleep comes to pay homage to our eyes. Next day? The circle repeats itself seamlessly. It wasn’t funny at all. These three weeks were the most tasking times I have ever experienced all my life but one phrase that kept me going is this; you can only experience this road once. So enjoy the moments no matter how challenging – a positive mindset; a psychological confidence booster!
In a nutshell, know that out of more than 8 billion people on mother earth, you are one of a kind. There is no other like you, nor would there ever be. The world is a better place with you in it. You are a plus to anyone that is fortunate enough to share your space. For as you think in your heart, so you are. This is the anchor of life and every other thing; success, wealth, etc.
Having schooled your thought processes positively, your day-to-day conversations must be in line with what you think for out of the abundance of the heart, the mouth speaks. Before stepping out each day, I usually would stand in front of my mirror and admire handsomeness; how royal and blessed it is to be me and I look forward to the day because it is blessed already for me. I could not wait to pelt random strangers with pebbles of smiles – be it acts of kindness or lines of jokes. The world would be a better place because I am in it today.
Then, in the evening, I would lie on my bed and smile broadly to myself on how I achieved those aims. There is nothing more heart-lifting and acts as a psychological confidence booster than being a source of joy to some random stranger you might never meet again.
On weekends, I would sit on my reserved seat in the living room, and hold mental virtual meetings with my members of staff scattered all around the globe. Listening to feedbacks and dishing out more responsibilities. I speak like there are people really listening to me. Then, I round off the meeting by telling them that I would be embarking on a vacation to some country in a week and that they should hold fort while I am gone. This is a board meeting’s mental exercise. Speak where you want to be into existence. I’m living this out now.
Discipline would help you to take proper control of your time and achieve things you never thought possible and in effect, boost your confidence in gunning for more challenging ones. There is the feel-good factor that comes with achieving your set goals daily. Little steps that ultimately lead to your conquering your life’s purpose.
To be disciplined means that you forgo temporal comfort for long term goals. It helps you to know that there are places you cannot go. Yes, average guys love to hang out a lot either at the close of work or after school hours, at beer lounges, and while away time on frivolous chatter. However, men made for the top cannot afford to live like that. This is not to say you cannot have fun, rather, your fun should not come unplanned and you should never go with the friends’ flow because you want to belong. Remember, if you don’t plan your life and let your friends and family fit into your plans, you would naturally fit into your theirs. For nature abhors a vacuum.
Those Who Would be Rich Must Learn to Travel Light.
There are things you cannot do, people you cannot let into your life, and those you need to cut off. For friendship is not by force but by choice. Chose your friends wisely. Because every relationship either adds positively to your goals or subtracts negatively from the same. No relationship leaves you neutral. Have a standard.
You must know that freedom brings great responsibilities for having to coordinate every aspect of your life.
You must plan your day-to-day activities; when to sleep, what to eat, do, etc.
From my research, I discovered that almost all great men utilize the night hours when every other average Joe is fast asleep, and most great inventions of mother earth today came from some thoughts at night. Hence, I rarely sleep at night. I do not drink beer also. Red wine for me, please.
Here is a little secret; I discovered very early in life that I love reading at night. This made me channel all my knowledge-seeking energy and time towards the night hours right from high school.
The greatest discovery anyone could make is self-discovery. On this lies the anchor of life and sweat-less success. Once discovered, it acts as a psychological confidence booster because now, you have a noble purpose to pursue every day you wake u[.
If you want a great body, you must learn to exercise daily. Even if you don’t have the time/means to register at a regular gym, there are a lot of great apps today that can help you work on various aspects of your body right from the comfort of your home without any exercising machine. This, coupled with the fact that you have to watch what you eat. As a life rule, I never swallow at night no matter how hungry( this and beer are the main reasons for potbellies! Very poor eating habits. I don’t believe the hereditary excuse). I eat very light at night so that I can stay alert and achieve my night’s aim.
Have value for time and all your resources
This is the major bane of the existence of Africans; they have no value for time. People pursue money (shaft) little did they know that ‘time’ is the real deal. For money lost can be recovered, however, time lost is gone forever. It behooves on you, therefore, to succinctly plan every hour of your day. Not just mentally but actually writing them down or typing it into your phone’s notepad synced with your calendar and virtual assistant( she always reminds me of each and every plan I have for the day at the exact time I told her to – usually 15mins before, depending on how far or near the appointment).
Here is a practical example for students, businessmen, and career guys;
MY CORE DAILY PLANS’ GUIDE
- 5-6am Worship, read God’s word, pray, and think( 30min worship, word, and prayers, 30min think time).
- 6-7am Read a book (about your profession, business, course, inspirational, etc)
- 7-7:30am Workout
- 7:30-7:50am Freshen up, eat and use 10min to roll to school or work or business place while listening to an inspiring audiobook or listening to the news.
- 8am-12noon working, or in the lecture hall
- 12noon-1pm Lunch/siesta ( while having lunch, listen to an audiobook. There are a lot of free and quality audiobook apps out there).
- 1pm-4pm Work/ Lecture hall
- 4-6pm Get home, freshen up, eat.
- 6-12pm arrange what you are going to read/work on at night, catch up on surf the net/news, and Sleep
- 12am-5am Hurray! It a new day!
And the cycle continuous daily. Streamline your life to these acute plans and watch how they act as a psychological confidence booster.
Now, take a moment to think and create a daily template for your weekends.
However, daily plans would be nothing but a monotonous merging of meaningless repetitive days if as an individual you do not have a vision of a future you want to live in.
I know a lot of people struggle to know what their vision in life is, though that is beyond the scope of this book, nonetheless, let me break it down in layman’s language.
It is nothing but what you dream to become in life. The is what spurs you on for another go when the going gets tough.
For instance, let’s say as a student, you want to have all ‘As’ in a session. This is your vision for the year. The major task now is to sit down and ask yourself this question; How do I achieve that? We know that a session is made up of two semesters and each semester is roughly three months.
To achieve that, you will need to deploy reasoning in coming up with a working plan( broken down steps on how one can attain their aims and objectives) for each semester in the following order. Firstly, how many courses are there in the first semester, and how many books/materials do you have to cover for each course? Write the answers to these questions down.
Secondly, which of the course might pose a little challenge? Write the answer down.
Thirdly, when do you have lectures and when are you free? Note the answer.
After answering the above questions sincerely, they would then form the raw material for your personal reading time table which will form a major part of your daily plans. While noting and allocating more reading time/slots to the courses that would pose some challenge.
Business/career guys can adapt this to their lives too.
More so, a business guy can have a vision of growing his brand to the entire globe before he turns 55 years old. To achieve this, he will break down that vision into a mission statement ( what he would need to do or the milestone the business would need to achieve daily, monthly, quarterly, yearly, 3 years, 5 years, 10years, etc). These would then form the target for all staff members including himself. This plan would be adapted into his daily plans as to how many books he would need to read, business/leadership/professional courses he would need to attend, networks he would need to have, etc.
Furthermore, a career guy might want to attain the peak of his profession at a certain age and probably visit one hundred countries before he turns 70. He will also need to plan what professional courses/certifications he needs to attend/get respectively, books he will need to read and incorporate that into his daily plans.
One thread cuts through all the examples above: stating in clear terms what they want to achieve and laying out simple daily steps to achieving the same and staying dedicated to the plan. This would help you stay focused and not get swayed by everything that blows by.
Your success or failure can be found in your daily activities. What do you spend time on daily? I would recommend you read, ‘Make Today Count’ by John C. Maxwell.
Don’t live your life fitting into others’ plans and going with the flow, learn to live out your plans and let others fit in.
One of my favorite quotes is: if you don’t pursue your dreams, others would pay you peanuts so that you can help them build theirs. The choice is yours.
Think and observe life
They say ‘knowledge is power and those who read, lead. But, reading without thinking and applying the result of those thoughts is worthless. Therefore, to those who think and apply the knowledge from such thought processes belongs the real power. If a man can think enough, solutions to life’s challenges would be readily available. Observe life, notice what people are complaining about within your vicinity, that may be a business opportunity to cash out by providing solutions. Have you sat down to imagine how sachet water came about? How about selfie sticks, drones, and the likes? They are all a result of people observing their immediate environment, noting the challenges, and providing solutions.
There is nothing like knowing something in every aspect of life and being able to contribute meaningfully to varied topics of discussion.
Here is a quote from Abiola Salami – The most powerful people are those who can control themselves( their appetite, freedom, time, and what they do)
If you can put all these to practice, they would act as a psychological confidence booster and you would achieve more in life and with every achievement, there is this sense of pride that fans your self-worth and net-worth.
You were made for far much more than you currently are tapping from. Dare for more, Go for gold.